Pictures of my early 20s

For guys hair is a pretty important matter. It can make you look young or old, and get you into style or not. Unfortunately, I haven't been that of a perfectionist when it comes to my hair. I hate going to the barber because they always cut the same way since I was still in Grade 3. Imagine that. So whenever I don't have enough money for a 'parlorista' haircut I go to barber shop and tell the barber to make it short enough to not stand up, do you get it? Anyway, here are some pictures to illustrate what I am talking about. Sometimes I just let my hair grow out, and sometimes I wear it really short.

You can't see it but I have a mullet here...

not my real hair...

going military

These are not before and after shots okay... Don't I look different wearing short hair and long hair? And not to metion some re-occuring acne and weight problems that also contribute to my changing appearance.

A thought was presented to me today by my younger cousin from my father side. "Ahiya RV, di ka bagay sa Divisoria". And I responded, "I take no offense, sabi rin nga ng iba at ng nanay ko, but it is still my birth right" (taking part in daddy's business). As it is people will immediately see how that it might possibly be true. I don't belong in Divisoria and many agree. But I don't, because that's only something you say when you really don't like someone. Right? Even if I don't fit the profile of someone going to Divisoria, if you like me, you will not say that to me. And I know a certain son( a graduate of DLSU just like me and he doesn't look tsaw huwan at all) of a Divisoria businessman who is currently handling their family business. And what about my Benildean sister? She might appear cowboy, but she doesn't like being poor, I know this becuase she "loves" branded clothes, shoes, socks, and most especially men's fragrances not to metion exquisite and delicious food. SO, don't tell me that I don't belong in Divisoria. And besides I want to help out.
I don't want to be suspicious because it only becomes a habit, but if you are surrounded by people who constantly imply and connote through their actions and words their motives and intentions, if they constantly insinuate something that is their own interests... at least I have the right to know. But what can I do but adapt. Even if I care about them liking me, what is the point? Somehow I am learning to convince myself to just accept certain facts about the world in relation to myself ( not saying that I'm ignorant, if I am then you are fooled). I know my relationship with other people, and I can observe them, and I know how my mom reacts to them, and I know how my sister reacts to them, and I know how my father plays the game... My part is a mental one. My influence is my presence. My words are something to be talked about. But I don't take pride in it, it is what it is, nothing more, nothing less. ( I really want to write down all of my suspicions but it would just be pointless and would totally contradict my previous statements, just sharing :D)

I am sorta smiling about the situation. In other places there will be always something to talk about, that's the way it is. Life is boring and nothing is more enjoyable than filling the void with cheap shots, ridicule and nonsense chatter. Hopefully, the job interviews I had these past weeks pays offf. I will get a new job and get my own money again. And then I will have to face other people's criticisms once more. And I will be more determined, more thick skinned, more aware, more secure and more ready to face whatever it is thrown in my direction. I will take it as it is. And I will know my place and what I must do.

So where is the passion when you need it the most?

Bad Day
Daniel Powter

Where is the moment we need at the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces everytime
And I don't need no carryin' on

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie

You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day

(Oh.. Holiday..)

Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong

(yeah...)

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Panel Interview is done and over with

This is the old building in divisoria where my father's office is located. Divisoria is a world that clashes with other worlds. Not many people I know would find Divisoria bearable to see everyday, but everywhere you look life is abundant and busy. It is also famous for the cheap and bustling markets, as well the hudlums, fights and delingquents that have their residence there. For the family, particularly my parents, it is where our lifestyle, the food that we eat, the clothes that we wear, our prestigious education, cars to bring us to places, and the roof above our heads come from. Needless to say, it is a very important place for the family. :D


Today was my scheduled Panel Interview. I had a hard time gathering my thoughts, hopefully I was sensible enough although I fear that my nervousness showed through. There were a couple of tough situations they had given me. From some of their body language, I know that many of them weren't impressed a bit about what I said. My parents were more worried for me. They were already saying that I should have answered some questions differently. Hakuna Matata.

I'm still having a hard time creating a home network. I think I need another LAN card.

Enigma

Enigma, click on this.

Dare you to move by Switchfoot

Welcome to the planet
Welcome to existence
Everyone's here
Everyone's here
Everybody's watching you now
Everybody waits for you now
What happens next?
What happens next?

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?
Salvation is here

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself
Lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened
Today never happened before